I'm Bored.... Is Your Problem.

"Sometimes my kids come to me and complain: 'Daddy, I' m bored." I tell them, 'Sorry. You aren't bored. You're having a semiotic breakdown.' They then run to their mother, who rolls her eyes and comforts them with 'Don't worry.  Your father's just having one of those semiotic spells. He'll get over it.'
But I'm right. And I'm not going to get over it. When my kids are bored, the problem is not with life fatigue. The problem is not with life. The problem is with them. In a state of semiotic awareness, all of life is bathed in beauty and sacredness. When they get bored, they have entered a state of semiotic breakdown."

("Nudge". Len Sweet. pg 46-47)

Dire Effects Does Not Mean It Is Not True Or Even Good

A life lesson that is hard to digest, but certainly rings true in my life and experience. It seems to ring doubly true today as we just bought tickets to return to Mali. Yes, the Mali in West Africa that had a political coup and sees Islamic radicals taking over 50% of it's land mass. The place now being referred to as the "African Afghanistan".

Yesterday, when we informed people of our choice,
one person simply sent us a link to some "incident" that occurred in Mali that day. As if we are not aware. Yes, it was not good news, but there has been a lot of that. As if we do not have weekly conversations with locals and the few expat people still on the ground in Mali every day. It's not like we are unaware that there are risks. But the implication at every corner is.....'There is risk, so it's OK to bail Andy'. However, with 5 million in critical food shortage and 500,000 displaced people fleeing the north, this is where someone needs to be.

Richard Rohr sums it up well. Western society, and the western church too, have come to believe our peace, comfort, and 'at ease', is the right of all folks, and that God is in the business of assuring it happens for us. If it's hard, demanding, risky, it's not God's will, it can't be....

Glad I finally understand my comfort is not what life and "God's business" is about. Much of the meaningful things in my life are immersed in risk. Certainly, the best relationships, and most meaningful memories in my life, all trace their roots back to these contexts.  The soft contexts have forged mostly a shallow, "Just smile and wave boys, smile and wave", kind of relationships that lack any real depth and a nonexistent staying power and afford few lasting impressions and memories.
But, I suppose, it could be just me.

"Just because something might have some dire effects does not mean it is not true or even good.  Just because something pleases people does not make it true either."
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Subverting The Norm

I can't express how ready I have been to shake up the norm in my life. Maybe that is why I'm here among a Muslim people in north west Africa.

"The best way of subverting the norm in the world, is by subverting the norm in ourselves." (Kent)

Aggressive Evangelism

We see people more as objects of our efforts, with preplanned outcomes. Outcomes, when not realized, cause us to drop people like a rag doll.
People are sick of church folks who's only invitation seems to be to some church event or other. Other than trying to recruit you to that, they don't seem to have much use for you.

"Evangelism as we know it hasn't worked. Either evangelism is so aggressive you want to get a restraining order, or else evangelism is so restrained you want to call it to order. Our strategies have been spectacularly useless at best, counterproductive at worst. We have lived through an exodus, but not of the biblical kind."

(Leonard Sweet. "Nudge". Pg 35)

So You Wanna Be a Missionary - Get a Job!

This article is just so on the money, in so many ways, I can't begin to express my thoughts on it. But, I recommend you share it with people looking abroad. People need life experience, not just "mission experience" to succeed here. There are certain cultural issues to working in such a place. However, sometimes we chalk too much up to "Cultural" issues or adjustments. A lot of what we deal with, what we attribute to "culture", is often just people like us needing to grow up in general. Lessons we need to learn EVERYWHERE, and anywhere we will land in life.

I see the same push in our church movement for ministry training. We are taking young men out of high school, putting them in an artificial environment of an Institutional training school, graduating them after four years only to have church leaders complain that the "kids" don't know anything. Why would they? They are still kids. They have a head full of theological doctrine, and life life of few experiences. They have not experienced the real world since they day they entered the theology institution. They lack life skills, relational skills,,,, not theology.....

Yet, there is this push to keep the kids in school longer, and push them through to a masters level as the new standard. All in the hopes they are "better trained" when they get out. So, now we have kids who are another $30,000  in school dept, being paid a pittance, who have added yet another two years of life in an artificial environment of a Theology school, and who STILL lack the people and relational skills. Things no school can teach, and no amount of time in school can compensate for the lack of. They need to be out there.

Sure, push for the Masters level as the new standard if you wish. All information is good. However, it will not fix the fact that these kids need help growing up and learning conflict resolution, and dealing with disgruntled coworkers, and difficult bosses. etc. They are not experts in life... so why treat them like they should be. That comes with life, time, and experience ONLY.  I would rather see the kids put out doing life after their BA. Let them learn life skills, and then come back ten years later for more schooling.  But they will then deserve better compensation too.

So, you wanna be a missionary...

Despite the fact that I have made my failings at being a missionary quite clear, younger folks still ask me for advice pretty often. It's like they go, “I have questions about being a missionary. Hmmm... I know! I'll ask the very worst one!” …. Ooookaay.

So here's the Very Worst Missionary's Very Best Advice for Missionarying:

Are you ready for it? 

Get a job!

Then? Work the hell out of that job for three years.

Honestly, this is the best advice I can give you.

I know. So disappointing.

But here's why:

A “real job” - yes, that's what people in ministry call work outside of the church. Scary! - anyway, a real job will teach you things you'll need to know in the mission field. Important stuff, like work ethic, sustainability, productivity, and value.

A real job can expose you to real conflict management (and not the shitty “Christian” kind they'll teach in missionary training. Honestly. Our track record at dealing with conflict is pretty horrible).

A real job will teach you to live on a real budget. Because if you say to your real boss, “Hey, can I have some more money for a new car this week?” They'll say “Um...No.” And then you'll have to save your money, like a normal person, and buy the car later. Or not buy the car. … I know. It's cRaZy!

A real job will help you learn not to be an entitled, self-righteous bunghole. Because if you act like that at a real job, they will kick your ass to the curb.

A real job will help you understand time management. Because, your real schedule will not likely allow you to spend three hours every Friday afternoon with your friends or your kids, - even if you call it “discipleship” on Facebook. Actually, that reminds me, your real job won't let you call any time you spend on Facebook “work”. Not “support development”, not “communication”, not “team building”... Nope. No matter how you say it, Real Job does not approve.

A real job will allow you to support a missionary. Yeah. You should know how that feels.

But, most important?... A real job is a real mission field. So learn some freakin' respect.

And the other thing I tell people is this (and it's a doozie!):

Understand the difference between wanderlust and

 wanting to be a missionary.

The world is AMAZING! God's creation is simply ASTOUNDING! It should be seen and respected. But there is a big difference between seeing and serving. And the Church does not exist to fulfill your desire to see the world.

I totally believe that this planet, this place God spoke into being, deserves our reverence. If it's calling out to you, then go, and revere it with all your heart! But don't use the Church to pay your way. And don't use your participation in weak or broken ministry as a means to collect stamps in your passport.

Get a job. Save your money. And then take a trip to somewhere incredible. Trust me, your tourist dollars will be greatly appreciated!

And this is where I bail, because, beyond what I've just said, I think the journey to becoming a missionary is highly unique and personal. It's spirit-led, prayer dependent, driven by hard work and perseverance, and it's not always awesome or easy.

If you still want to be a missionary, then maybe it's time for you to find a healthy ministry (which means asking lots of good questions and being mindful of the answers) and ask them how you can get on board with what they're doing.

That's my advice. ....What?! I never said it would be good advice. 

So, Blessings as you go. 

To work.

Aaaat a real job.  ;)

Humans On The Edge Teach Us The Most

"You can see perhaps what Jesus and Paul both meant by telling us to honor "the least of the brothers and sisters" (Matthew 25:40; 1 Corinthians 12:22-25) and to "clothe them with the greatest care." It is those creatures and those humans who are on the edge of what we have defined as normal, proper, or good who often have the most to teach us. They tend to reveal the shadow and mysterious side of things. Such constant exceptions make us revisit the so-called rule and what we call normal—and recalibrate!" (Richard Rohr. Calling Upward)

Wander......

"Not all who wander are lost" 

J. R. R. Tolkien

 

The Capital Of Africa Is?

"When I change planes in Dallas to fly to New York and then to Mali via Paris, I had been seated beside a friendly young woman who said she went to college in Dallas. She asked me where I was from. This question was getting more and more difficult to answer, but when I replied that I presently live in Africa, she exclaimed, "Africa! That's amazing. What's the capital of Africa?"
(Waiting For Rain: Life and Development in Mali, West Africa. Lewis Lucke. Pg 107)

Never Criticise The Church

Yep, the unpardonable sin is verbalizing anything  'analytical' (they would brandish the word "negative") about the whole enchilada.

"Jesus the Jew criticizes his own religion the most, yet never leaves it! Mature people are not either-or thinkers, but they bathe in the ocean of both-and. ( Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Simply Living And Useless Beauty

This insightful paragraph so describes my life up to my late 30's. I regret it now, much of what I worked so hard at, and for, were a wasted life of lost experiences and lost relationships.

Most 'things' don't matter. Do not serve institutions, their policy or structure. Love people, do them right, get to know them, spend meaningful time with them, just love them without the institutional agenda. 

"In our formative years, we are so self-preoccupied that we are both overly defensive and overly offensive at the same time, with little time left for simply living, pure friendship, useless beauty, or moments of communion with nature or anything."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

An Invitation From Your Soul!

Sigh.... ya.... that about sums it up for me. 

"What has led so many Peace Corps workers, missionaries, and skilled people to leave their countries for difficult lands and challenges? I would assume it was often a sense of a further journey, an invitation from their soul, or even a deep obedience to God." (Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Death & Dieing in Africa

He described the cycle and experience of death in an African Village very well.
"From time to time they went outside to check the sky and were chased back in by rain and wind that chilled them to their roots.
And there was death. Cruel, shameless, opportunistic death. This was its finest hour. It needed no stronger cues than these, hunger and foul weather, to begin vigorously attacking anyone whose grip on life was subject to dispute. It curled up in the laps of the very old. It lay uninvited on reed mats next to the newly born. It joined families inside huts and watched nagging coughs turn to advanced bronchitis and finally pneumonia. Back and forth through the rain it followed people with intestinal illnesses to outdoor latrines. "Go away, death," the nervous faces of the sick and elderly said. "The rain can't last forever. Harvest time is soon. Give us time."
But it didn't go away. Death took more villagers during this time of year than any other. The trail, the weak, the afflicted—many just couldn't make it. After each death, women members of surviving families took to the village paths, walking slowly, announcing their loss in the public manner of African custom. They filled the villages with a dark falsetto of song and wailing, of anguished screams and narrative. At night, funeral drums became a constant feature, their weird and surging sounds evoking macabre images like those in medieval paintings of lost souls plunging into nothingness.
During this season of heavy rains, the number of people dying in the villages made me shake. It wasn't just the cries. There were bodies. I saw bodies being buried in family compounds, a piece of wood or a stick cross placed at the head of each new mound. Nothing had prepared me for this. All my life death had been an abstraction, something that occurred infrequently, out of sight, in hospitals. It usually attacked relatives who were extremely old anyway, reducing the pain of the loss. But now I watched people bury their dead, of all ages; every day, all around me. I had seen thousands of murders on television before coming to Africa and had dined at a daily banquet of war and famine in the news. But to see death next door, to hear its attendant cries wafting through your windows, to see real-life people stop breathing and real-life survivors sob with sorrow - that is something else entirely."
(Mike Tidwell. The Ponds of Kalambayi. Pg 120,21)

Going To Hell With Ted

Most powerful article i have read in a long time. It illuminates perfectly our greatest need in evangelical circles.

http://www.christianitytoday.com/le/2012/december-online-only/going-to-hell-with-ted-haggard.html

I didn't plan to care about Ted Haggard. After all, I have access to Google and a Bible. I heard about what he did and knew it was wrong. I saw the clips from the news and the HBO documentary about his life after his fall. I honestly felt bad for him but figured it was his own undoing. When the topic came up with others I know in ministry, we would feign sadness, but inside we couldn't care less. One close friend said he would understand it more if Ted had just sinned with a woman. I agreed with him at the time. It's amazing how much more mercy I give to people who struggle with sins I understand. The further their sin is from my own personal struggles, the more judgmental and callous I become. I'm not proud of that. It's just where I was at that time in my walk. But that all changed in one short afternoon.

Eating our own

A while back I was having a business lunch at a sports bar in the Denver area with a close atheist friend. He's a great guy and a very deep thinker. During lunch, he pointed at the large TV screen on the wall. It was set to a channel recapping Ted's fall. He pointed his finger at the HD and said, "That is the reason I will not become a Christian. Many of the things you say make sense, Mike, but that's what keeps me away."

It was well after the story had died down, so I had to study the screen to see what my friend was talking about. I assumed he was referring to Ted's hypocrisy. "Hey man, not all of us do things like that," I responded. He laughed and said, "Michael, you just proved my point. See, that guy said sorry a long time ago. Even his wife and kids stayed and forgave him, but all you Christians still seem to hate him. You guys can't forgive him and let him back into your good graces. Every time you talk to me about God, you explain that he will take me as I am. You say he forgives all my failures and will restore my hope, and as long as I stay outside the church, you say God wants to forgive me. But that guy failed while he was one of you, and most of you are still vicious to him." Then he uttered words that left me reeling: "You Christians eat your own. Always have. Always will."

Change of heart

He was running late for a meeting and had to take off. I, however, could barely move. I studied the TV and read the caption as a well-known religious leader kept shoveling dirt on a man who had admitted he was unclean. And at that moment, my heart started to change. I began to distance myself from my previously harsh statements and tried to understand what Ted and his family must have been through. When I brought up the topic to other men and women I love and respect, the very mention of Haggard's name made our conversations toxic. Their reactions were visceral.

Please understand, this isn't just my experience. Just Google his name and read what is said about him in Christian circles. Most Christians would say God can forgive him, but almost universally people agree that God will never use him again. When I pressed the question, "Why can't God still use Ted?" I was dismissed as foolish or silly. Most of these people got mad and demanded I drop the subject. Perhaps they saw something I was missing, but this response seemed strange. After all, I reasoned, Jesus restored Peter after he denied Christ. That's a pretty big deal. And what about the Scripture that teaches us that the gifts and callings of God are irrevocable? So I felt I needed to meet Ted for myself. So I had my assistant track him down for a lunch appointment. I live outside Denver and he was living in Colorado Springs, a little over an hour away. Perfect!

We exchanged a few emails and agreed on a date and a restaurant. I took two men from my staff, and we met him for lunch. All the way there, I quietly played out in my head how he would act. Would he be reserved? Sad? Angry or distant?

Surprised by friendship

In less than five minutes of talking with Ted, I realized a horrible truth—I liked him. He was brutally honest about his failures. He was excited that the only people who would talk to him now were the truly broken and hurt. During our conversation a lady approached him. He instantly went into "pastor mode" and cared for her. Deep inside God was teaching me that true salvation is an ongoing process. We spent two hours together and decided to stay in touch. I began to call and ask him church-related questions. He possesses a wealth of wisdom. He even has a growing church in the very city that knows him for his biggest failures. I thought I had it tough as a church planter! But God is causing his church to really grow. I met his wonderful wife, Gayle. She is a terrific teacher of grace and one of my heroes. When I grow up, I want to be Gayle Haggard. And so I became close friends with Ted Haggard.

But then the funniest thing started happening to me. Some Christians I hung out with told me they would distance themselves from me if I continued reaching out to Ted. Several people in my church said they would leave. Really? Does he have leprosy? Will he infect me? We are friends. We aren't dating! But in the end, I was told that my voice as a pastor and author would be tarnished if I continued to spend time with him. I found this sickening. Not just because people can be so small, but because I have a firsthand account from Ted and Gayle of how they lost many friends they had known for years. Much of it is pretty coldblooded. Now the "Christian machine" was trying to take away their new friends.

It would do some Christians good to stay home one weekend and watch the entire DVD collection of HBO's Band of Brothers. Marinate in it. Take notes. Write down words like loyalty, friendship, and sacrifice. Understand the phrase: never leave a fallen man behind.

Where's the love?

I had a hard time understanding why we as Christians really needed Ted to crawl on the altar of church discipline and die. We needed a clean break. He needed to do the noble thing and walk away from the church. He needed to protect our image. When Ted crawled off that alter and into the arms of a forgiving God, we chose to kill him with our disdain. I wrestled with my part in this until I got an epiphany. In a quiet time of prayer, Christ revealed to me a brutal truth: it was my fault. We are called to leave the 99 to go after the one. We are supposed to be numbered with the outcasts. After all, we are the ones that believe in resurrection. In many ways I have not been aggressive enough with the application of the gospel. My concept of grace needed to mature, to grow muscles, teeth, and bad breath. It needed to carry a shield, and most of all, it needed to find its voice.

Grace must pick a side in the light of day, not just whisper its opinion in the shadows and dark places where we sign our name Anonymous. When a leader falls and then repents, grace picks a side. Grace is strong. Grace is a shield to those who cannot get off the battlefield. Grace is God's idea. Like a spiritual Switzerland, we stay in our neutral world where we can both forgive and judge but never get our hands dirty caring for the fallen. And when we don't pick a side, the wrong side gets picked for us. Crematoriums are more sanitary than hospitals. Let's change this!

Of course, I understand that if a person doesn't repent there is not a whole lot you can offer. But Ted resigned, confessed, repented, and submitted. He jumped through our many hoops. When will we be cool with him again? When will the church allow God to use him again? It's funny that we believe we get to make that decision.

The Ted Haggard issue reminds me of a scene in Mark Twain's, Huckleberry Finn. Huck is told that if he doesn't turn in his friend, a runaway slave named Jim, he will surely burn in hell. So one day Huck, not wanting to lose his soul to Satan, writes a letter to Jim's owner telling her of Jim's whereabouts. After folding the letter, he starts to think about what his friend has meant to him, how Jim took the night watch so he could sleep, how they laughed and survived together. Jim is his friend and that is worth reconsideration. Huck realizes that it's either Jim's friendship or hell. Then the great Mark Twain writes such wonderful words of resolve. Huck rips the paper and says, "Alright then, I guess I'll go to hell."

What a great lesson. What a great attitude. I think of John 15:13, "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends." Maybe it's not just talking about our physical life. Perhaps it's the life we know, the friends we have and lose. Maybe I show love when I lay down the life we have together to confront you on a wrong attitude or action. Maybe we show no greater love than when we are counted with people who others consider tainted. Becoming friends with Ted was a defining moment in my life, ministry, and career. Sure, I lost a few relationships, but I doubt they would have cared for me in my failures. So really, I lost nothing. If being Ted's friend causes some to hate and reject me—alright then, I guess I'll go to hell.

Dance in Mali, West Africa.

This is just so Malian..... Glad to be flying back to Mali, West Africa next week.

Mali, West Africa. Beauty and Diversty

Fishing on the famous Niger river in Mali. This is a long, long way from where Man of Peace Development is working. However, Man Of Peace Staff had an opportunity to visit the river region last February. The fisherman told us that with lack of rain the last few years, more and more farmers buy a net and try their hand at fishing, and it is really depleting the river stocks. So it is a difficult ti

me for the BOZO (ethnic group) fisherman too.

If we only had a river like this in our region for farming.......But that is why Man of Peace is there. Simple gravity feed drip irrigation does not require massive volumes of water to grow a garden.

50% of Mali is actually in the Sahara desert. However, it is a beautifully diverse country. We are excited to return to work in Mali next week. The political situation in the north is an ongoing concern. However we are able to return to Sikasso region at this time.

Theological Education (Seminary) Must Change?

Nelson/Fitch - Theological Education in the 21st Century from Medri Kinnon Productions on Vimeo.

Ministers Are Not Only Those in "Staff Positions"

Not all Theological graduates need to seek church "staff positions". There are many ways to be do ministry. Bi vocational, or even working in other fields full time.  Great conversation here. 

Nelson/Fitch - Theological Education in the 21st Century from Medri Kinnon Productions on Vimeo.

Ministers - Pastors Have More To Loose In Canada

Ministers of the church have absolutely no respect or relevance in the Canadian ethos outside their church. 
Pastors in Post-Christendom from Medri Kinnon Productions on Vimeo.

Where is the church?

This Cartoon just about says it all....about church.
where is the church?

Doing Life Different!

"Spiritual direction begins when people are helped to walk more slowly, talk more slowly and eat more slowly." (Francis de Sales)

As a person with a "get it done" personality.... I am beginning to see that running ahead in my life has not always accomplished what I wanted.  

Sadly, much of my teaching, that path leadership takes today, keeps us hyper active, and exhausted, as we try to accomplish our...... "something"...... However, in the end, we have little time left for the people we love, or want to love. We excel at heaping activities and events on people. To "accomplish" all this stuff we feel needs to "get done", we can side step the greater things. I know have. 

Jesus said the highest activities in life are to love God and to love others.  Amazing how we depersonalize that from time with others, to creating programs and doing stuff "to" them, and it keeps us busy planning and executing.

This quote exposes a truth. 

• If we walk more slowly, we are not ticking off lists, and spending more time on the journey with people walking beside.

• If we talk more slowly, we say less, and we are listening more.

• If we eat more slowly, we turn eating from "energy" consumption to fuel another task, and turn it into table time with a few precious others.

I hope the next half of my life reflects this better.

AJR lost in a West African Journey

When People Refuse To Affirm Your Journey!

"Those are the things I remember, the things instilled in my life, that you've got to follow God where ever he is drawing you to go, even if the people you care about don't understand what you are doing. And I think that is a hard lesson. I think a lot of people have been so schooled into wanting peoples approval, that it is very hard to be obedient to God when the people you care about can't affirm what you are doing. And yet, where else do you go? What else do you do except follow the Lord, and trust the Lord with the consequences of what that is....."  (Wayne Jacobsen in a conversation with his 90 yr old dad on a podcast Nov, 2012)  

Being the first, and only people working among an all Islamic people in North Africa, this resonated. Fortunately, none of my family, and few of my friends (not many), have ever actively discouraged me personally. But almost everyone around me wants to hear very little about "over there". People don't actively discourage us, but they do oh so little to actively encourage us either.  What to be the best fried you can be to a person who lives and works internationally? Just let them talk, and listen, listen, and listen. They have to get the stories out for time to time or they will pop, trust me. The story has to be told from time to time. And if you ask questions, and listen, you will be offering a healing favor  to them

"Is it safe to go?", is the most common question, and it's the most annoying too.  Yes,,50% of the country was taken over by Al Qaeda and a Jehad called Anser Dine.  Is it "Risless"? No, it never is, but why run away when those affected most need you more than ever.... all in the demand for perfect and complete safety.  But out region is "relatively" secure.

Anyway, most people can't fathom doing such a "risky" thing, so avoid the subject all together. We are deafened by their silence about the whole thing. But I'm OK with that. I've moved past that maybe 10 yrs ago.

The quote, also resonated about my spiritual journey, my "ministry"' in Canada too. Stepping out of traditional paid ministry, the customary way of doing church. Turning from managing the heavy  attractional programing/special event model of church, refusing to get bogged down in local church management as a CEO, and avoiding a structure that makes the Sunday event (and a few other time slots) the main thing that needlessly consumes most of our resources (Both time and money) to maintain while burning out those who sustain it, and grows them little in return, and that reduces members to mere spectators and "volunteers" seen as recruits to fill the predefined slots in the "vision" of we "Leader(s)", in exactly the way we envision it. (INHALE)



Yes, few of the people living that dream can affirm what I am doing here in Canada either. How can church and kingdom work be so simple, so economical, and so easily repeated by ordinary people?  (I'll not even mention....so NOT burdensome....oops, that slipped out). Is this for real? For most, the church is only what we do, and how we do it, there in that building on Sunday. They simply can't fathom any other viable manifestation of the body. They have known, nor seen anything else.

Yes it's hard, and lonely, to obey God when others can't affirm the journey. 

So, yes, this conversation really resonated.
AJ

Staying On A Path Going Nowhere

"Most of us in the first half of life suspected that all is not fully working, and we are probably right...We do not want to embark on a further down journey if it feels like going down, especially after we have put so much sound and fury into going up.... The supposed achievements of the first half of life have to fall apart and show themselves to be wanting in some way, or we will not move further. Why would we?.... Scott Peck's major insight is his best selling book, 'The Road Less Traveled'. He told me personally ones that he felt most western people were just spiritually lazy. And when we are lazy, we stay on the path we are already on, even if it is going nowhere.".
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Living On The Outskirts

"I found out that God wanted me to live on the outskirts, abide on the fringe of this world so I could see things more clearly and hear His voice better. And I wasn't alone. I met other Fringe-Dwellers who had the same passions and heart that I did. I became an outcast for God, allowing myself to be more vulnerable so He could shine through me better"

Emma Jones, and recuperating MK.

It's about how I feel, and I am a grown adult. 

Techno Savy Church! But What About The Relationship?

 In my Previous post "Two Stories About Church. Technology and Relationships", I shared how we are often out of touch with building relationships,  and the use of what has become simple every day technology as a great tool to get our job done.

Well the following Sunday I was speaking at another church, in another city. They had a digital welcome center, the screen told me that they have free WiFi, and gave me instructions on how I could down load a U-Bible app, so I could look up scriptures "live" using the WiFi.

Of course there were all the modern instruments and PowerPoints and lighting...... and Hip old me used my Tablet to speak from.... and once again, " No trees were harmed in the development or delivery of this message.!"

Oh the show was good, the speaker meh? ;-) But what about the connection with each other?
Really the service was engaging, but PEOPLE were not engaging any different, before and after the service, than the chunky chipped cell phone church crew, that shuts down digital bible usage. But in all fairness, we got to chat with  sweet young girl who is in foster care.

I've said it from the "Pulpit", and unfortunately I have heard it parroted most places since. I am ashamed of my self....

We have told people that church is not about "you" it's about "Him". What you get out of it does not matter, what matters is what He get's out of it (Ringing a bell yet? Sure it does!).

All sounds good and holy, but it's wrong... Look at the theme of "One Another" and tell me our gatherings are not about "You" and "others" too.  The It's just the churches way to keep your discontent quiet. Just don't stir the pot here.  "It's just you!" It's certainly not anyone else in this place, it's just simply, plainly, always, and ONLY, you. You just need to change your attitude, pray and read your bible more.

See we have made the gathering the central main thing, the main focus of most o our tie and efforts. Despite the fact that the words "Worship Service" should never be put together, and never are in the NT. The word Worship is never used to describe a gathering of people...... eeeemmmmm Wa? Yes, we don't even use the word "Worship" or "Church" in any true biblical way.  If you say you "go" to church, you have just taught someone a false meaning of the biblical word. Check it.

I have discovered three things about these kinds of "Corrective" statements

Orphanages Create More Orphans

In Canada, Orphanages have been exposed for the sad, poorly funded, managed, and sometimes (All too often) abusive structures they are. This kind of institution is just not capable of being a healthy experience for the children put in them. Rather support a family structure., where children are integrated into a family.

I find it amazing that in Canada we have shut down all such institutions. Because the truth has been revealed about how harmful such an environment is for young children. Yet, we Canadians continue to fund the building of these very same institutions in other underdeveloped countries.

Despite the greatest staff, greatest intentions, orphanages harm a child's healthy development. They grow up to be people with NO family.... a kind of "tribless" people. Also, I was reading an IRIN article recently that claimed that the majority of children in orphanages are not parent-less anyway. Many are there simply because parents or community think the child might have a better life in the "nice" home, with three meals and possibly an education (Not always the case). Which is often more than what they can offer the children. What, if the funding was directed to those desperate families DIRECT, orphanage "attendance" would drastically decline. Without the presence of a local orphanage, the parents just carry on and keep their kids and do the best they can, and the community continues to take them. For the truly homeless, we can place these children with loving families who will care for them. This is the model we should use.

Yet Christian churches continue to blindly support the building of such things overseas, without question, without thinking about what we learned here at home. In the last twenty years, have we not read the articles, and heard the hundreds of Radio interviews with people who were raised in these institutions?


I link a very good TED video about this subject. I don't expect it will actually change what we do. Institutions always justify their existence, because we are always doing it better... "more righter"...... or we are "Christians" so our good motivations change the experience for the kids...
Orphanages, in my opinion need to close, for the health and well being of Children. Children need family, even foster or adoptive families.

"Often charity to help the poor attracts more people into poverty. One example I have noticed takes place when North Americans try to care for the needs of orphans in cultures different from our own. If you build really nice orphanages and provide good food and a great education, lots more children in those places become orphans. I see this happen all over. When we attempt to eradicate poverty through charity, we often attract more people into “needing” charity. It is possible to create need where it did not exist by projecting our standards, values and perception of need onto others. "
-- Steve Saint

Don't Plant A Church The Normal Way!

I read this great article today about what not to do as we seek to grow with others into a new faith community. I don't care for the term "House Church" as a house changes nothing for most christian people who gather in them. They do church the same old way... with the same mindsets entrenched. This article really put out some wisdom and insight. Felicity Dale did us a great service putting these out there.

The easiest way to plant a house church

It’s probably not what you think!

Most Christians, especially those from a more traditional form of church background, assume the obvious way to start any kind of church is to invite a few Christians to their home for fellowship. As other believers join them and the group gets large enough, they will multiply out into two churches and so on.

This is not the best way for several reasons:

1. The Christians will bring all their preconceived ideas about church with them. It will be more of a challenge to think in the fresh, out-of-the-box ways that simple/organic church requires. The temptation will be to do “Honey, I shrunk the church!”
2. It is more difficult to be missional–existing believers tend to focus on the gathering. Many Christians don’t have non-believers within their sphere of influence.
3. You are trying to create community where a natural one doesn’t exist. Yes, there is a “fellowship of the Holy Spirit” with all other believers, but as you add people to a group, it will take time for people to share their everyday lives together outside of meetings.
4. Multiplication usually occurs very, very slowly.

It is far easier to make disciples of those who don’t yet know the Lord, and to work within their existing sphere of influence. As their family and friends find the Lord, multiplying churches are the natural result. The advantages:

1. The problems and issues that come up are those of life, not theology or ecclesiology.
2. Community already exists and their shared lives will continue outside of the meeting context.
3. New disciples have a natural mission field all around them and evangelism follows spontaneously along relational lines.
4. It’s easy to create a vision and expectation of multiplication.

What has been your experience?  Can you think of other reasons to primarily work with not-yet-believers?

Two Stories About Church! Technology & Relationships

"Those who accept the burden of knowing do not necessarily have answers, but they are alert to alternatives and potential solutions.Those in denial can only hope that reality can be buried for a while longer." (Charles Smith)

 Some of you know that I have been living my faith outside of traditional institutions (Church buildings and their programming) for a while now.

Funny thing for a guy who planted nine churches, is it not?

I served in the box as a traditional minister for many years. However, after working in West Africa and seeing simple faith communities emerge under mango trees, communities who were also planting other new communities, my eyes were opened to the reality that we really don't need to waste so many resources on structure, staff, and programing. In the west we are CONVINCED that NO ONE could ever possibly grow healthy without participating in all this stuff we organize for them. That assumption is just wrong. Look around the world....look at how the majority around you are growing after participating in all the stuff we "offer them" to participate in. Are you out of a job yet?

So rather than continue the duplicity of living one philosophy of ministry in Africa, and another here, I joined them in both places. Now my time is spent less on management of programs and church events, and serving and gathering directly with people with a passion for personal or world transformation.

It's been a joy to step outside the box. Traditional ministry was very stressful for me. I'm not against all that, it's just that I serve and gather differently. Few have even clued into my new life change....as I don't talk about it. Ya, right, you know why..... they often don't get it, even if they get it, most don't like it. 

Anyway, this spring I had a good number of speaking dates at various church buildings. The last two times I was at a "Church" funny things happened. I have to tell you.

1. The first was I was SHHHHHHHED at a Baptist church.

 No kidding. Just as service was about to start, an older gentleman walked down the pew in front of me, stopped and looked me over, and then asked if we knew each other. I indicated that I was from a town some distance away, so probably not. He said he lived in the same area and..... That was when the old Guy and I were SHHHHHHH'ed.... from across the isle. SHHHHed so loud the whole church heard the lady in her late 60's. The whole crew was in the 60 + range.

Anyway, I was not offended. I get it.... I've run the show, remember. The service was just then starting. Someone had mounted the pulpit, and that is the moment when what happens on stage becomes paramount, and all other human interaction and relationship is to cease, nothing between you and a friend matters now. The main thing, the only important things,  are going on up there...  ;-)

Anyway, my reaction? I looked at her and smiled in disbelief, and shook my head laughing. Yep, I laughed at her.  I'm not asking you to pick sides..... I am not from that church, but I will remember this for the rest of my life. What if another visitor was not as "thick skinned"?

2. I was asked to turn my Bible off...... well...." kind a......"

Waiting For Apologies?

Apologies rarely come from the sources  they should come from the most. Life.

"LIFE BECOMES EASIER WHEN YOU LEARN TO ACCEPT
AN APOLOGY YOU NEVER GOT."
•ROBERT BRAULT-

What Has Been Said Is Not Enough!

"What moves men of genius, or rather what inspires their work, is not new ideas, but their obsession with the idea that what has already been said is still not enough." (Eugene Delacroix)

I think there are many subjects, issues, human disasters, hidden and neglected people....for whom too little has been said....

What Others Think?

"What other people think of you is not your business. If you start to make that business your business, you will be offended for the rest of your life." Deepak Chopra

How much Life Given Up?

"The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it" (Henry Thoreau)

Don't Let Wacadoodles Get To You!

"Keep safe and don't let the wackadoodles get to you. They got to me and I suspect I will never be the same again"...... (Wisdom from a friend.. AB)

A good friend of mine, for over 20 yrs, sent this line to me in an email today.  It really resonated with me, because in our line of work:

1. We encounter many "Wackadoodles".
2. Our institution has no ethos to deal with wackadoodles. In fact the ethos is to cater to them.

3. One is never permitted to expose wackadoodle behavior, it's a cardinal rule of silence.

4. We would lose our job for exposing wackadoodle behavior because you failed to coddle them. 

Anyway, it's why I had to start serving outside the traditional box.... Here people don't have to fake that we are all doing the journey the same way, when it is clear we certainly are not. I may sit with wackadoodles, heck, I may be one myself.... But I have come to realize we are faking it.... I certainly am not united with most peoples journey. Often their vision, and direction is heading elsewhere. 
When I lived faking this faky unity, like I was taught to,  wackadoodles got the best of me.... i'm tired of them..

Early Adopters Torn To Pieces

"If there is no wise authority capable of protecting them and validating them, most prophetic or wise people and all "early adopters" are almost always "torn to pieces." Their wisdom sounds like dangerous foolishness, like most of Jesus' Sermon on the Mount to Christians, like Gandhi to Great Britain, like Martin Luther King Jr. to white America, like Nelson Mandela to Dutch Reformed South Africa, like Harriet Tubman to the Daughters of the American Revolution, like American nuns to the Catholic patriarchy."
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Dress Rehearsal Rituals.

This has been my experience too. The rituals that once seemed sacred, now seem like a faint shadow compared to living in his reality every day. He is no longer relegated to certain 'power' times, places or events. The people we meet there are great, and we need others. But God is no more powerfully there than any other time and place.

"In the beginning, you tend to think that God really cares about your exact posture, the exact day of the week for public prayer, the authorship and wordings of your prayers, and other such things.
Once your life has become a constant communion, you know that all the techniques, formulas, sacraments, and practices were just a dress rehearsal for the real thing—life itself—which can actually become a constant intentional prayer."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

We will Run......

"Until you speak grace, we will despise you. Until you speak love, we will only hear a clanging gong. Until you speak truth, we will run from your institutions." (Jessica Bowman)

Language Learnings Positive Side

I found this to be true with every place and people I have been among, with the exception of the French. Especially true of of Africans and their local languages.

"I knew I had made many grammatical mistakes, but I was sure that they were not smiling because of that. In fact, no one ever laughed at any of our grammatical errors. They seemed proud of us for making the effort to learn their language, and I could feel this in their warm response......"
(Barrios Of Manta. Earle & Elizabeth Brooks)

Longing For Simplicity

"Our stuff, the more of it we have, enslaves our thoughts, actions, and time. Imprisoning us, locking up many possibilities, many freedoms, many other paths."

”Live simply so that others can simply live.”  (Elizabeth Seton)

Sometimes It's MORE THAN OK not to Care!

"I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court....."  (Apostle Paul) 1 Corinthians 4:3-5.

Paul was speaking to the church in the first part... amazing... I'm flabbergasted....

Actually, i have been freed from allowing people to manipulate me by how, where, and when they choose to withhold their praise, or launch their criticism. It's about getting you "in line", and see it for little else than that.  

However, how and where we serve, both overseas in an all Islamic community..... and here in Canada.....well much of it I would never have ventured into doing for the kingdom if I followed the "church plan" or listened to peoples criticisms by getting all wrapped up in the box of manipulation their judgement brings. There are some people who get REALLY angry when you won't play their church game by plunking down like a mindless sheep into their style of Church, leadership "box", or easy road programs. 

No, I'm not rebelling.... I'm doing my best to do what Christ does, when most want the easy road. A lot of church people live in a deep fear of being contaminated by association with people who have other Christian beliefs, other religion beliefs. They have to keep away, and be separate (especially their kids). Oh my word..... this is how we have taught our kids we don't have to love as "missionaries"   the community or world. Because there are exceptions of who we have to love and be hospitable too.

No Time For Relationships Or Serving

This was written in 1960's, and is so true. Who has time to juggle the events and management pushed on us by various groups we are part of?

"The truth of it is that personal contacts at home take considerable time and effort, which most busy Americans simply don't have. The day and a half a week that Rhoda and I had free whisked by at play rehearsals with our little-theater group or at the small art gallery that we helped operate. During the week there were symphony rehearsals, choir practice, professional-group meetings, hobbies, Rhoda's girl scout troop, socializing with good friends, night extension classes, and, of course, the weekend chores of yard and home. These were not good or bad, wise or unwise choices of interests; they were, like many other things that Americans do, merely activities we thought important to the fulfillment of our lives. Even the most discriminating use of time left us unable to extend ourselves for social service projects of any duration."

(Barrios of Manta. Rhoda & Earle Brooks, 2012)

Criticisms Commonly Made When People Work Overseas

This was written in mid 1960's. It's still the typical reaction.

"We were the first people from our area to leave for the Peace Corps, and the reaction of our friends and fellow citizens ranged from shock and bitterness to encouragement and praise. Many thought we were crazy to give up our good life and two years of potential advancement to expose ourselves to health hazards and unknown dangers. Others said things like, "Why don't you leave the work to the foreign service and to the missionaries? We don't need more people overseas." And still others criticized us for not staying home to help those less fortunate around us."

(Barrios of Manta. Rhoda & Earle Brooks)

Happy Serving Nations.

"Dedicate some of your life to others.Your dedication will not be a sacrifice. It will be an exhilarating experience because it is intense effort applied toward a meaningful end. My wish is that you will utilize yourself as a force of unity in the fragile peace of today. And that you will know the happiness that comes of serving others who have nothing."

(Dr.Tom Dooley)

Compassion For The Exceptions

"Jesus had no trouble with the exceptions, whether they were prostitutes, drunkards, Samaritans, lepers, Gentiles, tax collectors, or wayward sheep. He ate with outsiders regularly, to the chagrin of the church stalwarts, who always love their version of order over any compassion toward the exceptions." (Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Deadly Accident

My friend in Mali hit a young girl and killed her. And this is how the family reacted.

"So I'm still waiting for a call for an appointment with the Judge, Today God really surprised me. The father of the girl called and wanted to come visit.
He brought his best friend with him and they really wanted me to know that for them, this was over and done., they want me to 'sit my heart down' (Bambara translation), that they know what happened was an accident. Here, people really believe in God's sovereignty and don't question it, like we do in our culture. They want me to go on with work and life. They want me to come and visit them whenever I pass through their village. They wanted me to know that sometimes God brings people together in ways we don't understand.
Ya...l'm so blown away by this whole grace thing, Keep praying for God's timing and for patience as we all wait out the final proceedings.

You Can't Just Let A Baby Die

I've been in his Peace Corps workers shoes. Ecuador in 1960's.

"We'll take Doilito to the doctor in the morning," I announced firmly. I didn't have much money, either, but I had enough to get a baby to a doctor and to buy milk. And this time I had some second thoughts about our usual policy of not giving out money. You can't just lie in bed and listen to a baby die."

(Barrios Of Manta. Rhoda & Earle Brooks)

Unlearning is Often The Real Issue

As a West African NGO, I have to deeply agree with this statement. The real pivotal points are almost always hinged more on local peoples resources, resourcefulness, history and habits, than it is about any new ideas we try to introduce.

"...transformation is often more about unlearning than learning "

(Robert Rohr. Falling Upward)

Ordinary....Men Without Visions

"What choice remains?
Well, to be ordinary is not a choice:
It is the usual freedom
Of men without visions
(Thomas Merton)

There is Nothing To Join?

"All we can give back and all God wants from any of us is to humbly and proudly return the product that we have been given—which is ourselves! If I am to believe the saints and mystics, this finished product is more valuable to God than it seemingly is to us......True religion is always a deep intuition that we are already participating in something very good, in spite of our best efforts to deny it or avoid it. In fact, the best of modern theology is revealing a strong "turn toward participation," as opposed to religion as mere observation, affirmation, moralism, or group belonging. There is nothing to join, only something to recognize, suffer, and enjoy as a participant."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Church Sends You On Tangents

A very frank and honest statement by a Catholic clergymen. You pour your heart out, and sometimes expected to do so for things that, in your view, don't matter. But the congregation dictates the rules of the game. Do it, or loose your job, eventually.

There are things that thrill me about ministry, and others that kill my soul. The things that kill my soul, I've never met anyone who cares that they do. It's just how it is, so suck it up, is the attitude, not that I have ever said much about what kills my soul to a leadership. Again, its ALWAYS you, not anything about the system. Few really want to think of better ways, as it's easy and comfortable to stick with the usual, the automatic, the rote memory.
Having written all this, Richard Rohr suggests it's good in some way. The truth sets us free, but not before making us miserable.

"Church membership requirements, church doctrine, and church morality force almost all issues to an inner boiling point, where you are forced to face important issues at a much deeper level to survive as a Catholic or a Christian, or even as a human. I think this is probably true of any religious community, if it is doing its job. Before the truth "sets you free," it tends to make you miserable. The Christian truth, and Jesus as its spokesman, is the worldview that got me started, that formed me and thrilled me, even though the very tangent that it sent me on made me often critical of much of organized Christianity. In some ways, that is totally as it should be, because I was able to criticize organized religion from; Scriptures, saints, and sources, and not by merely cultural, unbelieving, or rational criteria.
That is probably the only way you can fruitfully criticize anything, it seems to me. "
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

So Captures Mali

I drive one of those motor bikes everywhere, into the bush, around the town. My wife on back too. The view driving down the road...... felt like I was driving.

Watch "From Here to the There" on YouTube

Wisdom!

"Travel light. Live light. Spread the light. Be the light." (unknown)

 But I think this about sums up where I'm heading.

Sitting In Silence In Africa

Peace Corps worker who served in Benin wrote this about her time with the village women. It mirrors what I have heard a lot of expat women have express. It seems to be harder for women to break the cross-cultural ice.

"Besides big Mama and a few other women, most of them had not gone to school and, therefore, didn't know French. I visited them, but the visits mostly consisted of my sitting on a bench, saying nothing while they sat on a bench saying nothing.

Or we would shell peanuts together, or pound peanuts together, but no one talked as the peanut shells piled up, and I coughed when I inhaled fine chunks of the shells. Sometimes my visits reminded me of a bizarre compilation of bad first dates—nobody said much, and I spent the whole time trying to think of ways to
politely end the experience.

When a conversation actually did take place in French, it usually led to dramatic increases of knowledge and cultural appreciation on my part."
(Last Moon Dancing. Monique Schmidt. Pg110)

Changing Expectations In Africa.

"Most volunteers quickly realize that effecting major changes in village patterns was not only exhausting and sometimes dangerous, but for the most part futile....(pg 62) .......

"My original goal for my classes centered on teaching English. Now I consider a successful class one in which all machetes remain on the floor." (pg 58)

(Last Moon Dancing: Memoir of Love and Real Life In Africa. Monique Schmidt.)

We Got You Instead of The Pump We Needed.

A reality check for a Peace Corps worker..... I actually told some new arrivals, that given the choice to have you, or your money, a lot of people would tell you to go home and not come back, just give us your money.  Sure it is an exaggeration, but this is how a lot of Africans feel about us and what we do in their village. Of course, the new filed workers I said this to were quite horrified at my statement. Ten years later they reminded me about what I said (I had long forgotten) and said at times we wonder if they really like us or not, or just the money we bring. But that is life with people in any country.  Some love you, some love the stuff your bring them, some love neither. Some "love" you as long as your giving them what they want. When you are not, they don't want a relationship.

"No one understands your formal French or how you can teach when you can't bargain for rice. This village needs a pump but we got you."

 (Last Moon Dancing: A Memoir of Love and Real Life in Africa. Monique Schmidt)

Learn to Love the Sky I'm Under

You heard my voice
I came out of the woods by choice.....Left a clouded mind and a heavy heart.
I will call you by name I will share your road....
But hold me fast, Hold me fast Cuz I'm a hopeless wanderer
And I will learn, I will learn to love the skies I'm under

(Hopeless Wanderer. Mumford & Sons)

Of Little Importance Later

I have found good things from my past. However, there is much of it that needed to be dropped to move forward at this stage of my journey and life.

"One cannot live the afternoon of life according to the program of life's morning; for what was great in the morning will be of little importance in the evening, and what in the morning was true will at evening have become a lie."

(CARL JUNG, THE STRUCTURE AND DYNAMICS OF THE PSYCHE)

Best Pictures of Mali, West Africa.

Worth a look

http://www.izlaphotography.com/2012/09/20/mali/

Literate Freedom

Working in an African region with the highest illiteracy rate in the world, this statement made me stop and think. There are villages we work in that do not even know their president was ousted by his own military, or that Islamic radicals seized half their country.

“To be literate is not to be free, it is to be present and active in the struggle for reclaiming one's voice, history, and future." (Henry Giroux)

Death Sheltered In The West......

"But don't you see?" Kazadi had said, averting his eyes from mine. "The children die" . The words had pricked me, and I had averted my eyes too.
Yes, the children die. In all my years prior to going to Africa, I attended a total of four funerals. In two years in Kalambayi I attended, at least briefly, close to two hundred. Three-quarters of them were for children. I estimated that one third of all the sons and daughters in the area died before the age of five. Some farmers I worked with had lost five or six kids.
Still, nothing brought this ghastly reality home to me more than Miteo's condition. I needed him and cared for him, and now he was dying. Watching his body wither away, I understood as I never had before the deep fear shared by parents in Kalambayi. There were many reasons why parents refused to limit family sizes, but the biggest was the fear that death would do it for them."
(MikeTidwell. The Ponds of Kalambayi. Pg 174)

Death Does It For You..... Family Size

"But don't you see?" Kazadi had said, averting his eyes from mine. "The children die."
The words had pricked me, and I had averted my eyes too.
Yes, the children die. In all my years prior to going to Africa, I attended a total of four funerals. In two years in Kalambayi I attended, at least briefly, close to two hundred. Three-quarters of them were for children. I estimated that one third of all the sons and daughters in the area died before the age of five. Some farmers I worked with had lost five or six kids

Still, nothing brought this ghastly reality home to me more than Miteo's condition. I needed him and cared for him, and now he was dying. Watching his body wither away, I understood I never had before the deep fear shared by parents in Kalambayi. There were many reasons why parents refused to limit family sizes, but the biggest was the fear that death would do it for them."
(Mike Tidwell. The Ponds of Kalambayi. Pg 174)

Worship The Status Quo

"If change and growth are not program- med into your spirituality, if there are not serious warnings about the blinding nature of fear and fanaticism, your religion will always end up worshiping the status quo and protecting your present ego position and personal advantage—as if it were God!"
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

When It's Yes For You....But No for Friends

"There is a certain real loneliness if you say yes and all your old friends are saying no. So be prepared when your old groups, friendships, and even churches no longer fully speak to you the way they used to. But I promise you that those confusing feelings are far outdistanced by a new ability to be alone—and to be happy alone. One of the great surprises at this point is that you find that the cure for your loneliness is actually solitude!"
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)