Don't Plant A Church The Normal Way!

I read this great article today about what not to do as we seek to grow with others into a new faith community. I don't care for the term "House Church" as a house changes nothing for most christian people who gather in them. They do church the same old way... with the same mindsets entrenched. This article really put out some wisdom and insight. Felicity Dale did us a great service putting these out there.

The easiest way to plant a house church

It’s probably not what you think!

Most Christians, especially those from a more traditional form of church background, assume the obvious way to start any kind of church is to invite a few Christians to their home for fellowship. As other believers join them and the group gets large enough, they will multiply out into two churches and so on.

This is not the best way for several reasons:

1. The Christians will bring all their preconceived ideas about church with them. It will be more of a challenge to think in the fresh, out-of-the-box ways that simple/organic church requires. The temptation will be to do “Honey, I shrunk the church!”
2. It is more difficult to be missional–existing believers tend to focus on the gathering. Many Christians don’t have non-believers within their sphere of influence.
3. You are trying to create community where a natural one doesn’t exist. Yes, there is a “fellowship of the Holy Spirit” with all other believers, but as you add people to a group, it will take time for people to share their everyday lives together outside of meetings.
4. Multiplication usually occurs very, very slowly.

It is far easier to make disciples of those who don’t yet know the Lord, and to work within their existing sphere of influence. As their family and friends find the Lord, multiplying churches are the natural result. The advantages:

1. The problems and issues that come up are those of life, not theology or ecclesiology.
2. Community already exists and their shared lives will continue outside of the meeting context.
3. New disciples have a natural mission field all around them and evangelism follows spontaneously along relational lines.
4. It’s easy to create a vision and expectation of multiplication.

What has been your experience?  Can you think of other reasons to primarily work with not-yet-believers?

Two Stories About Church! Technology & Relationships

"Those who accept the burden of knowing do not necessarily have answers, but they are alert to alternatives and potential solutions.Those in denial can only hope that reality can be buried for a while longer." (Charles Smith)

 Some of you know that I have been living my faith outside of traditional institutions (Church buildings and their programming) for a while now.

Funny thing for a guy who planted nine churches, is it not?

I served in the box as a traditional minister for many years. However, after working in West Africa and seeing simple faith communities emerge under mango trees, communities who were also planting other new communities, my eyes were opened to the reality that we really don't need to waste so many resources on structure, staff, and programing. In the west we are CONVINCED that NO ONE could ever possibly grow healthy without participating in all this stuff we organize for them. That assumption is just wrong. Look around the world....look at how the majority around you are growing after participating in all the stuff we "offer them" to participate in. Are you out of a job yet?

So rather than continue the duplicity of living one philosophy of ministry in Africa, and another here, I joined them in both places. Now my time is spent less on management of programs and church events, and serving and gathering directly with people with a passion for personal or world transformation.

It's been a joy to step outside the box. Traditional ministry was very stressful for me. I'm not against all that, it's just that I serve and gather differently. Few have even clued into my new life change....as I don't talk about it. Ya, right, you know why..... they often don't get it, even if they get it, most don't like it. 

Anyway, this spring I had a good number of speaking dates at various church buildings. The last two times I was at a "Church" funny things happened. I have to tell you.

1. The first was I was SHHHHHHHED at a Baptist church.

 No kidding. Just as service was about to start, an older gentleman walked down the pew in front of me, stopped and looked me over, and then asked if we knew each other. I indicated that I was from a town some distance away, so probably not. He said he lived in the same area and..... That was when the old Guy and I were SHHHHHHH'ed.... from across the isle. SHHHHed so loud the whole church heard the lady in her late 60's. The whole crew was in the 60 + range.

Anyway, I was not offended. I get it.... I've run the show, remember. The service was just then starting. Someone had mounted the pulpit, and that is the moment when what happens on stage becomes paramount, and all other human interaction and relationship is to cease, nothing between you and a friend matters now. The main thing, the only important things,  are going on up there...  ;-)

Anyway, my reaction? I looked at her and smiled in disbelief, and shook my head laughing. Yep, I laughed at her.  I'm not asking you to pick sides..... I am not from that church, but I will remember this for the rest of my life. What if another visitor was not as "thick skinned"?

2. I was asked to turn my Bible off...... well...." kind a......"

Waiting For Apologies?

Apologies rarely come from the sources  they should come from the most. Life.

"LIFE BECOMES EASIER WHEN YOU LEARN TO ACCEPT
AN APOLOGY YOU NEVER GOT."
•ROBERT BRAULT-

What Has Been Said Is Not Enough!

"What moves men of genius, or rather what inspires their work, is not new ideas, but their obsession with the idea that what has already been said is still not enough." (Eugene Delacroix)

I think there are many subjects, issues, human disasters, hidden and neglected people....for whom too little has been said....

What Others Think?

"What other people think of you is not your business. If you start to make that business your business, you will be offended for the rest of your life." Deepak Chopra

How much Life Given Up?

"The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it" (Henry Thoreau)

Don't Let Wacadoodles Get To You!

"Keep safe and don't let the wackadoodles get to you. They got to me and I suspect I will never be the same again"...... (Wisdom from a friend.. AB)

A good friend of mine, for over 20 yrs, sent this line to me in an email today.  It really resonated with me, because in our line of work:

1. We encounter many "Wackadoodles".
2. Our institution has no ethos to deal with wackadoodles. In fact the ethos is to cater to them.

3. One is never permitted to expose wackadoodle behavior, it's a cardinal rule of silence.

4. We would lose our job for exposing wackadoodle behavior because you failed to coddle them. 

Anyway, it's why I had to start serving outside the traditional box.... Here people don't have to fake that we are all doing the journey the same way, when it is clear we certainly are not. I may sit with wackadoodles, heck, I may be one myself.... But I have come to realize we are faking it.... I certainly am not united with most peoples journey. Often their vision, and direction is heading elsewhere. 
When I lived faking this faky unity, like I was taught to,  wackadoodles got the best of me.... i'm tired of them..

Early Adopters Torn To Pieces

"If there is no wise authority capable of protecting them and validating them, most prophetic or wise people and all "early adopters" are almost always "torn to pieces." Their wisdom sounds like dangerous foolishness, like most of Jesus' Sermon on the Mount to Christians, like Gandhi to Great Britain, like Martin Luther King Jr. to white America, like Nelson Mandela to Dutch Reformed South Africa, like Harriet Tubman to the Daughters of the American Revolution, like American nuns to the Catholic patriarchy."
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Dress Rehearsal Rituals.

This has been my experience too. The rituals that once seemed sacred, now seem like a faint shadow compared to living in his reality every day. He is no longer relegated to certain 'power' times, places or events. The people we meet there are great, and we need others. But God is no more powerfully there than any other time and place.

"In the beginning, you tend to think that God really cares about your exact posture, the exact day of the week for public prayer, the authorship and wordings of your prayers, and other such things.
Once your life has become a constant communion, you know that all the techniques, formulas, sacraments, and practices were just a dress rehearsal for the real thing—life itself—which can actually become a constant intentional prayer."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

We will Run......

"Until you speak grace, we will despise you. Until you speak love, we will only hear a clanging gong. Until you speak truth, we will run from your institutions." (Jessica Bowman)

Language Learnings Positive Side

I found this to be true with every place and people I have been among, with the exception of the French. Especially true of of Africans and their local languages.

"I knew I had made many grammatical mistakes, but I was sure that they were not smiling because of that. In fact, no one ever laughed at any of our grammatical errors. They seemed proud of us for making the effort to learn their language, and I could feel this in their warm response......"
(Barrios Of Manta. Earle & Elizabeth Brooks)

Longing For Simplicity

"Our stuff, the more of it we have, enslaves our thoughts, actions, and time. Imprisoning us, locking up many possibilities, many freedoms, many other paths."

”Live simply so that others can simply live.”  (Elizabeth Seton)

Sometimes It's MORE THAN OK not to Care!

"I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court....."  (Apostle Paul) 1 Corinthians 4:3-5.

Paul was speaking to the church in the first part... amazing... I'm flabbergasted....

Actually, i have been freed from allowing people to manipulate me by how, where, and when they choose to withhold their praise, or launch their criticism. It's about getting you "in line", and see it for little else than that.  

However, how and where we serve, both overseas in an all Islamic community..... and here in Canada.....well much of it I would never have ventured into doing for the kingdom if I followed the "church plan" or listened to peoples criticisms by getting all wrapped up in the box of manipulation their judgement brings. There are some people who get REALLY angry when you won't play their church game by plunking down like a mindless sheep into their style of Church, leadership "box", or easy road programs. 

No, I'm not rebelling.... I'm doing my best to do what Christ does, when most want the easy road. A lot of church people live in a deep fear of being contaminated by association with people who have other Christian beliefs, other religion beliefs. They have to keep away, and be separate (especially their kids). Oh my word..... this is how we have taught our kids we don't have to love as "missionaries"   the community or world. Because there are exceptions of who we have to love and be hospitable too.

No Time For Relationships Or Serving

This was written in 1960's, and is so true. Who has time to juggle the events and management pushed on us by various groups we are part of?

"The truth of it is that personal contacts at home take considerable time and effort, which most busy Americans simply don't have. The day and a half a week that Rhoda and I had free whisked by at play rehearsals with our little-theater group or at the small art gallery that we helped operate. During the week there were symphony rehearsals, choir practice, professional-group meetings, hobbies, Rhoda's girl scout troop, socializing with good friends, night extension classes, and, of course, the weekend chores of yard and home. These were not good or bad, wise or unwise choices of interests; they were, like many other things that Americans do, merely activities we thought important to the fulfillment of our lives. Even the most discriminating use of time left us unable to extend ourselves for social service projects of any duration."

(Barrios of Manta. Rhoda & Earle Brooks, 2012)

Criticisms Commonly Made When People Work Overseas

This was written in mid 1960's. It's still the typical reaction.

"We were the first people from our area to leave for the Peace Corps, and the reaction of our friends and fellow citizens ranged from shock and bitterness to encouragement and praise. Many thought we were crazy to give up our good life and two years of potential advancement to expose ourselves to health hazards and unknown dangers. Others said things like, "Why don't you leave the work to the foreign service and to the missionaries? We don't need more people overseas." And still others criticized us for not staying home to help those less fortunate around us."

(Barrios of Manta. Rhoda & Earle Brooks)

Happy Serving Nations.

"Dedicate some of your life to others.Your dedication will not be a sacrifice. It will be an exhilarating experience because it is intense effort applied toward a meaningful end. My wish is that you will utilize yourself as a force of unity in the fragile peace of today. And that you will know the happiness that comes of serving others who have nothing."

(Dr.Tom Dooley)

Compassion For The Exceptions

"Jesus had no trouble with the exceptions, whether they were prostitutes, drunkards, Samaritans, lepers, Gentiles, tax collectors, or wayward sheep. He ate with outsiders regularly, to the chagrin of the church stalwarts, who always love their version of order over any compassion toward the exceptions." (Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Deadly Accident

My friend in Mali hit a young girl and killed her. And this is how the family reacted.

"So I'm still waiting for a call for an appointment with the Judge, Today God really surprised me. The father of the girl called and wanted to come visit.
He brought his best friend with him and they really wanted me to know that for them, this was over and done., they want me to 'sit my heart down' (Bambara translation), that they know what happened was an accident. Here, people really believe in God's sovereignty and don't question it, like we do in our culture. They want me to go on with work and life. They want me to come and visit them whenever I pass through their village. They wanted me to know that sometimes God brings people together in ways we don't understand.
Ya...l'm so blown away by this whole grace thing, Keep praying for God's timing and for patience as we all wait out the final proceedings.

You Can't Just Let A Baby Die

I've been in his Peace Corps workers shoes. Ecuador in 1960's.

"We'll take Doilito to the doctor in the morning," I announced firmly. I didn't have much money, either, but I had enough to get a baby to a doctor and to buy milk. And this time I had some second thoughts about our usual policy of not giving out money. You can't just lie in bed and listen to a baby die."

(Barrios Of Manta. Rhoda & Earle Brooks)

Unlearning is Often The Real Issue

As a West African NGO, I have to deeply agree with this statement. The real pivotal points are almost always hinged more on local peoples resources, resourcefulness, history and habits, than it is about any new ideas we try to introduce.

"...transformation is often more about unlearning than learning "

(Robert Rohr. Falling Upward)

Ordinary....Men Without Visions

"What choice remains?
Well, to be ordinary is not a choice:
It is the usual freedom
Of men without visions
(Thomas Merton)

There is Nothing To Join?

"All we can give back and all God wants from any of us is to humbly and proudly return the product that we have been given—which is ourselves! If I am to believe the saints and mystics, this finished product is more valuable to God than it seemingly is to us......True religion is always a deep intuition that we are already participating in something very good, in spite of our best efforts to deny it or avoid it. In fact, the best of modern theology is revealing a strong "turn toward participation," as opposed to religion as mere observation, affirmation, moralism, or group belonging. There is nothing to join, only something to recognize, suffer, and enjoy as a participant."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Church Sends You On Tangents

A very frank and honest statement by a Catholic clergymen. You pour your heart out, and sometimes expected to do so for things that, in your view, don't matter. But the congregation dictates the rules of the game. Do it, or loose your job, eventually.

There are things that thrill me about ministry, and others that kill my soul. The things that kill my soul, I've never met anyone who cares that they do. It's just how it is, so suck it up, is the attitude, not that I have ever said much about what kills my soul to a leadership. Again, its ALWAYS you, not anything about the system. Few really want to think of better ways, as it's easy and comfortable to stick with the usual, the automatic, the rote memory.
Having written all this, Richard Rohr suggests it's good in some way. The truth sets us free, but not before making us miserable.

"Church membership requirements, church doctrine, and church morality force almost all issues to an inner boiling point, where you are forced to face important issues at a much deeper level to survive as a Catholic or a Christian, or even as a human. I think this is probably true of any religious community, if it is doing its job. Before the truth "sets you free," it tends to make you miserable. The Christian truth, and Jesus as its spokesman, is the worldview that got me started, that formed me and thrilled me, even though the very tangent that it sent me on made me often critical of much of organized Christianity. In some ways, that is totally as it should be, because I was able to criticize organized religion from; Scriptures, saints, and sources, and not by merely cultural, unbelieving, or rational criteria.
That is probably the only way you can fruitfully criticize anything, it seems to me. "
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

So Captures Mali

I drive one of those motor bikes everywhere, into the bush, around the town. My wife on back too. The view driving down the road...... felt like I was driving.

Watch "From Here to the There" on YouTube

Wisdom!

"Travel light. Live light. Spread the light. Be the light." (unknown)

 But I think this about sums up where I'm heading.

Sitting In Silence In Africa

Peace Corps worker who served in Benin wrote this about her time with the village women. It mirrors what I have heard a lot of expat women have express. It seems to be harder for women to break the cross-cultural ice.

"Besides big Mama and a few other women, most of them had not gone to school and, therefore, didn't know French. I visited them, but the visits mostly consisted of my sitting on a bench, saying nothing while they sat on a bench saying nothing.

Or we would shell peanuts together, or pound peanuts together, but no one talked as the peanut shells piled up, and I coughed when I inhaled fine chunks of the shells. Sometimes my visits reminded me of a bizarre compilation of bad first dates—nobody said much, and I spent the whole time trying to think of ways to
politely end the experience.

When a conversation actually did take place in French, it usually led to dramatic increases of knowledge and cultural appreciation on my part."
(Last Moon Dancing. Monique Schmidt. Pg110)

Changing Expectations In Africa.

"Most volunteers quickly realize that effecting major changes in village patterns was not only exhausting and sometimes dangerous, but for the most part futile....(pg 62) .......

"My original goal for my classes centered on teaching English. Now I consider a successful class one in which all machetes remain on the floor." (pg 58)

(Last Moon Dancing: Memoir of Love and Real Life In Africa. Monique Schmidt.)

We Got You Instead of The Pump We Needed.

A reality check for a Peace Corps worker..... I actually told some new arrivals, that given the choice to have you, or your money, a lot of people would tell you to go home and not come back, just give us your money.  Sure it is an exaggeration, but this is how a lot of Africans feel about us and what we do in their village. Of course, the new filed workers I said this to were quite horrified at my statement. Ten years later they reminded me about what I said (I had long forgotten) and said at times we wonder if they really like us or not, or just the money we bring. But that is life with people in any country.  Some love you, some love the stuff your bring them, some love neither. Some "love" you as long as your giving them what they want. When you are not, they don't want a relationship.

"No one understands your formal French or how you can teach when you can't bargain for rice. This village needs a pump but we got you."

 (Last Moon Dancing: A Memoir of Love and Real Life in Africa. Monique Schmidt)

Learn to Love the Sky I'm Under

You heard my voice
I came out of the woods by choice.....Left a clouded mind and a heavy heart.
I will call you by name I will share your road....
But hold me fast, Hold me fast Cuz I'm a hopeless wanderer
And I will learn, I will learn to love the skies I'm under

(Hopeless Wanderer. Mumford & Sons)

Of Little Importance Later

I have found good things from my past. However, there is much of it that needed to be dropped to move forward at this stage of my journey and life.

"One cannot live the afternoon of life according to the program of life's morning; for what was great in the morning will be of little importance in the evening, and what in the morning was true will at evening have become a lie."

(CARL JUNG, THE STRUCTURE AND DYNAMICS OF THE PSYCHE)

Best Pictures of Mali, West Africa.

Worth a look

http://www.izlaphotography.com/2012/09/20/mali/

Literate Freedom

Working in an African region with the highest illiteracy rate in the world, this statement made me stop and think. There are villages we work in that do not even know their president was ousted by his own military, or that Islamic radicals seized half their country.

“To be literate is not to be free, it is to be present and active in the struggle for reclaiming one's voice, history, and future." (Henry Giroux)

Death Sheltered In The West......

"But don't you see?" Kazadi had said, averting his eyes from mine. "The children die" . The words had pricked me, and I had averted my eyes too.
Yes, the children die. In all my years prior to going to Africa, I attended a total of four funerals. In two years in Kalambayi I attended, at least briefly, close to two hundred. Three-quarters of them were for children. I estimated that one third of all the sons and daughters in the area died before the age of five. Some farmers I worked with had lost five or six kids.
Still, nothing brought this ghastly reality home to me more than Miteo's condition. I needed him and cared for him, and now he was dying. Watching his body wither away, I understood as I never had before the deep fear shared by parents in Kalambayi. There were many reasons why parents refused to limit family sizes, but the biggest was the fear that death would do it for them."
(MikeTidwell. The Ponds of Kalambayi. Pg 174)

Death Does It For You..... Family Size

"But don't you see?" Kazadi had said, averting his eyes from mine. "The children die."
The words had pricked me, and I had averted my eyes too.
Yes, the children die. In all my years prior to going to Africa, I attended a total of four funerals. In two years in Kalambayi I attended, at least briefly, close to two hundred. Three-quarters of them were for children. I estimated that one third of all the sons and daughters in the area died before the age of five. Some farmers I worked with had lost five or six kids

Still, nothing brought this ghastly reality home to me more than Miteo's condition. I needed him and cared for him, and now he was dying. Watching his body wither away, I understood I never had before the deep fear shared by parents in Kalambayi. There were many reasons why parents refused to limit family sizes, but the biggest was the fear that death would do it for them."
(Mike Tidwell. The Ponds of Kalambayi. Pg 174)

Worship The Status Quo

"If change and growth are not program- med into your spirituality, if there are not serious warnings about the blinding nature of fear and fanaticism, your religion will always end up worshiping the status quo and protecting your present ego position and personal advantage—as if it were God!"
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

When It's Yes For You....But No for Friends

"There is a certain real loneliness if you say yes and all your old friends are saying no. So be prepared when your old groups, friendships, and even churches no longer fully speak to you the way they used to. But I promise you that those confusing feelings are far outdistanced by a new ability to be alone—and to be happy alone. One of the great surprises at this point is that you find that the cure for your loneliness is actually solitude!"
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Self-Image Not Worth Protecting

"Your persona is what most people want from you and reward you for, and what you choose to identify with, for some reason. As you do your inner work, you will begin to know that your self-image is nothing more than just that, and not worth protecting, promoting, or denying."
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Live Simply

"Live simply so that others can simply live"  Elizabeth Seton

Old Ought To Explore

"Old men ought to be explorers
Here and there does not matter
We must be still and still moving
Into another intensity
For another union, a deeper communion"
—T. S. ELIOT, "EAST COKER"

Leave Home To Find It

"You will see that this pattern is rather universal. Instead of our "Don't leave home without it" mentality, the spiritual greats motto seems to be "Leave home to find it!"
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Even Whores Get Lucky.....

"So the church is both my greatest intellectual and moral problem and my most consoling home. She is both pathetic whore and frequent bride.   There is still a marvelous marriage with such a bride, and many whores do occasionally become brides too. In a certain but real sense, the church itself is the first cross that Jesus is crucified on, as we limit, mangle, and try to control the always too big message. All the churches seem to crucify Jesus again and again by their inability to receive his whole body, but they often resurrect him too. I am without doubt a microcosm of this universal church."
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

The Gospel Too Big

"I nor the churches themselves really live much of the real Gospel—at least enough to actually change our present lifestyles! It is just too big a message."
(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward.)

By too big, he means there is great depth and scope to the gospel. Its more than a person can live up to. So we always have things to learn and grow into. A radically different idea than most churches teach. They teach we can lie up to it and should.

Why Would We Leave Comfort?

"There is no practical or compelling reason to leave one's present comfort zone in life. Why should you or would you? Frankly, none of us do unless and until we have to.
The invitation probably has to be unexpected and unsought. If we seek spiritual heroism ourselves, the old ego is just back in control under a new name. There would not really be any change at all, but only disguise. Just bogus "self-improvement" on our own terms."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Who Jesus Has Issues With

"Jesus is never upset at sinners (check it out!); he is only upset with people who do not think they are sinners!"

Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Uncommunicated Feelings

This is such a reality of working in the bush in Africa, or Asia.

"Yes even as my village friendships improved, made by the hunt and other experiences, the lonely times in Kalambayi never left me. There were a lot of them, times when I felt utterly by myself and close to bursting from the pressure off uncommunicated feelings."

(Mike Tidwell. The Ponds of Kalambayi, pg162)

Who Wants Change? Give Me A Tame Tribe. Not!

"As a priest of forty years, I find that much of the spiritual and pastoral work of churches is often ineffective at the levels of real transformation, and calls forth immense passivity and even many passive-aggressive responses. As a preacher, I find that I am forced to dumb down the material in order to interest a Sunday crowd that does not expect or even want any real challenge; nor does it exhibit much spiritual or intellectual curiosity.
"Just repeat what I expect to hear, Father, and maybe a joke or two!" As a spiritual director, I find that most people facing the important transformative issues of social
injustice, divorce, failure, gender identity, an inner life of prayer, or any radical reading of the Gospel are usually bored and limited by the typical Sunday church agenda. And these are good people! But they keep on doing their own kind of survival dance, because no one has told them about their sacred dance. Of course, clergy cannot talk about a further journey if they have not gone on it themselves."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Make A Soul?

"We do not "make" or "create our souls; we just "grow" them up."

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

Set Out On A New Course

”Most of us are never told that we can set out from the known and the familiar to take on a further journey" 

(Richard Rohr. Falling Upward)

The Beauty Of Both And......!

"Mature people are not either-or' thinkers, but they bathe in the ocean of 'both-and'."
Richard Rohr

LATER-Life is Less Predictable Less Controllable

"The world is more magical, less predictable, more autonomous, less controllable, more varied, less simple, more infinite, less knowable, more wonderfully troubling than we could have imagined being able to tolerate when we were young.

(JAMES MOLLIS, FINDING MEANING IN THE SECOND HALF OF LIFE)