"A marriage vow is saying, "I know that you're trouble! Me too! So we won't leave, no matter what happens. Well that's one hell of a vow. But that's why it's a vow. That's why you take it infront of a bunch of people. That's why it's supposed to be a sacred act. What's the alternative? What's the alternative?
Everything is mutable and changable at any moment. Go ahead and live your life like that and see what you're like when you are fifty. Jesus, it's dismal. Two or three divorces. You're family us fragmented. You've got no continuity of narrative. And it's not good for the kids, not by any stretch of the imagination. It's a form if voluntary slavery i suppose.
It's also the equilivant to the adoption of a responsibility. And there is more too it than that. If you can't (won't) run away, you can solve your problems.
Because, it might be, I'm stuck with you, so how about we fix things. Because the alternative is that we are going to be in a boxing match for the next forty years. That's your alternative.
So, and you think you're going to fix your problems without something like that hanging over your head? There isn't a chance. You'll just avoid them
That is what people do. It's really hard to solve problems, especially in a relationship.
.... do you think you will do that (sort it out) unless there is a good reason?
No! We better sort this out because we are going to be carrying it around for the next forty years. That, maybe, is enough motivation so that you actually try hard to solve a problem.
It's a lot easier to say, " Ha, we're not going there." But then, good, you'll have it every day, every goddam day for the rest of your life."
Jordan Peterson
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